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Archive for November, 2014

Thought Catalog

Breakups are really hard.

It doesn’t matter if it was six months or six years. It doesn’t matter if you were the dumper or the dumpee because regardless, it’s still a big change in your life and it’s really going to hurt.

I was with my ex for four years. It was nearing the make-it-or-break-it period where, by society’s standards of people in their late 20s, you should be thinking of “putting a ring on it” or maybe grow up the strength to end it.

Sadly, my heart was just never 100% there. He was a splendid man, but I wasn’t ready for any aisle lined with rose petals or joint bank accounts.

Breaking up with him was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. (Like way harder then that advanced Pilates class that almost sent me to the ER.) It was a pain that was somewhere between getting…

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Thought Catalog

Shutterstock / Matusciac AlexandruShutterstock / Matusciac Alexandru

The Foxtail

If you’ve ever owned a dog or other pet that goes outside, you know how damaging this cluster of grass can be. These little suckers become lodged, and depending where they get stuck, can actually continue burrowing through soft tissue and organs. Unfortunately, human versions of these plants exist. Foxtails can be difficult to spot at first. It’s an off-handed comment about your mother. A quiet scoff. Subtle moments of undermining what you say. Belittling your dreams, but only a teeny bit, so what’s the harm? The negativity a Foxtail spews starts slowly, but one day you wake up and are undeniably suffocated with self-doubt, insecurity, and general unhappiness. Beware of the Foxtail. They burrow into your heart, and you often don’t even realize until it’s too late.

The Gilded Cage

“A Bird in a Gilded Cage” is famous song from the 1900s composed…

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Thought Catalog

Erin KellyErin Kelly

Love is all-pervasive. I have an entire playlist on my phone of songs that don’t revolve around love as the central motif, and sadly, it’s woefully small. I’ve been told again and again that true love is, and should be, a priority in my life. I’ve been conditioned to accept and believe that I’m supposed to have love, but I’m not good enough for it yet. Which is why, I have to constantly change, constantly alter myself, all in hopes of having someone say those magical words to me.

I’ve never had a man confess his undying love for me. Never had the romantic gesture performed for me, that left me swooning. As a young teenaged female with a healthy emotional and physical drive, this puzzled me for the longest time. I fall in love. I’ve fallen in love. And I’ve done it with everything I have in…

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Thought Catalog

ShutterstockShutterstock

You know those times when you just got your heart broken, and you’re thinking, “I should’ve known, I really should’ve known”? Well, I say, yes, you really should have, but there’s nothing you can do about it now, except take a little time off wallowing and then get your ass off that couch and your guard back up. So I’ve decided to help by preparing a list of situations in which falling in love would only result in heartbreak, to help you avoid repeating the same mistake.

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1. Don’t fall in love in a relationship that started off with lust

This is the kind of love story that has graced both the big screen and the small screen many, many times and it had fooled a great many of us into thinking that we, too, could fall in love with a one-night stand. But it’s different…

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Thought Catalog

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You deserve love and security, a combination that warms the core of your heart. You deserve knowledge that the person you are with wants to be there and, more importantly, won’t run away when times get tough. This is someone that will stay by your side, fight your fights right there with you because they know you would do the same for them.

You deserve someone who laughs at your jokes and smiles at the mere sight of you smiling. This smile will be genuine, not fake, and you will feel butterflies when you see it and your smile will grow until your cheeks can no longer take it.

You deserve someone who brings you coffee in the morning because they know the addiction is real. You deserve breakfast in bed, flowers “just because,” and hugs that feel like you are at home.

You deserve hands…

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